Biet Simkin is a spiritual teacher and artist whose forthcoming book, Don’t Just Sit There, shares 44 insights for taking a meditation practice off the cushion and into the real world. We sat down with Biet to hear how she learned to trust the process and how to bring meditation into everyday life as a mama.
For mamas who don’t know your story, please share a bit about your personal journey and how it led you to where you are today. How did you learn to trust the process?
Everyone died, I had no money, I turned to parties and alcohol, I almost died, had a daughter who died of SIDS, my house burned down, and many other things—until I kicked heroin, cocaine and drinking in one day 10 years ago and turned my life over to my father’s work as a spiritual teacher. I trust the process because I choose the process today. I co-create it with the invisible.
How has it felt to become mama to baby Cash after losing a daughter to SIDS years ago?
It felt horrifying. I felt like this child would be in danger in my care. I had the notion that “I kill babies.” I had to really shake this shit out of me, because it wasn’t true and it wasn’t going to support me being a good mommy to Cash! I used the pain and horror of this to write a new story. Today I feel amazing and strong and more embodied than I have ever felt. Cash is now 5 months old! I am the rock and roll mom I always dreamed I would be!
What role does fear play in your life as a new mama? How do you transmute that fear?
I am afraid of everything when I think about it. So I have resolved that thinking is not my friend. I turn to no mind to be in essence. In general, when I am afraid, I go into this upside down world where I see things rightly. I see that fear is just evidence of my desire and potential. I punch it in the face and make it my pet. Either fear is gonna walk me on a leash or I am gonna walk it! So I choose to walk it.
How do I do this? I pray, I meditate, I do affirmations, I allow myself to be with the feeling. I don’t run from fear. I go towards it.
How does meditation help us bring the experiences we want to see in our lives into being?
We need to be in love with both the seen and unseen worlds in our lives. We need to be able to truly get that if we don’t love and surrender to the unseen world, then the seen one will always be lacking in it’s full expression. Meditation allows a romance with the unseen world.
In your forthcoming book, you share how we can bring meditation off the cushion and into the real world. What might that look like for a busy working mama?
Exactly! This book shows how these 44 laws work against our enlightenment. In one law, the Law of Divided Attention, I teach readers how to meditate while shopping, eating, having dinner or breastfeeding. By using this particular law and form of meditation as a guide, you can do both. I do this all the time and thus am meditating all the time! This makes being a mom so much easier and it means I don’t have to be confined to a cushion!
How do you experience the divine in your own everyday life?
I stop experiencing my mind’s lies. I take a time-out by falling into my breath. As I slip into the Bliss that is ever-present, I am able to tap into the present, but also suck out of it big ideas that expand my life and keep me in flow!
The ideas that you bring up may feel radical to some reading this. Are they?
They are radical! Awakening is radical! It’s strange and sexy and vibrant and scary! I am not gonna wrap shit in a bow for people. If you want the goods you’re gonna have to get out of your old habits and do something completely different! What I do offer is relatable, and anyone can do it! But the truth is: if you really wanna bite into life you have to be willing to really jump and trust you’ll fly… like Wendy.
Tell us about the joy being mama to baby Cash has brought into your life.
There are no words. It’s beyond anything I have ever seen, felt or known. I now know how much my mother loved me. I now get how hard it must have been for her to die and leave me at the young age of 39. I think that’s healed me in a lot of ways.
Put your soul first, you second, the baby third, and you will be great!
It takes a village, so make sure to learn to get vulnerable and to get what you need!
Meditate, because people are always telling me "it goes by so fast, it goes by so fast" and I’m like, what the f are they talking about!? It seems to be going by just as it should. Find time to meditate. If you can't, buy my book and learn to meditate while you do other things by following the Law of Divided Attention. Do whatever you have to do to get outside the matrix and live live live!